I am just coming back from my second training on Clinical Hypnosis with Rapid Trauma Resolution, my new passion. It is hard for me to put into words my experience of this training but it is definitely an incredible and extremely powerful and appealing process for me. I really like how, many times, we are taught concepts that are so counterintuitive and contrary to what I have been taught before, yet it seems to yield the best results I have seen. I think Dr. C. has a true gift and I love that he enjoys sharing it. I was delighted that he picked me to demonstrate some of the techniques he was teaching and this had the benefit of continuing the work we had begun when I had met with him back in March. It felt like he was doing an adjustment just like a chiropractor would and I felt extremely grateful that he would do that for me. The neuropathy in my fingers even improved as a result of it! At some point, as he was demonstrating one of the techniques, he asked me to choose between a butterfly and a hummingbird. Here I am sitting in front of 40 seasoned clinicians and am asked to choose between these 2 creatures that I knew very little about. All I could think about was making the right choice! What if I choose the wrong one? And why a butterfly or a hummingbird? why couldn’t he ask me between let’s say a lion and a sheep – the choice would have been so obvious to me. I would have then picked the almighty, strong, and powerful lion as opposed to the vulnerable and weak sheep. But no, I had to choose between 2 little creatures I am not particularly fond of or interested in. I couldn’t keep everyone waiting so I pretty much randomly said “butterfly” and Dr. C. readily responded “good” and nodding his head as if he was approving of my choice he proceeded to tell me that butterflies “travel far”. No one laughed, I thought my choice was ok, I dodged that one! Then he had me focus on the butterfly and I had a vivid picture of a monarch appear in my mind. I wish I could remember all the words he used with me when my mind was in that optimal state of responding to those uplifting and healing words. However, one of the only things I could remember afterwards was this thing about the butterfly. I kept wondering if I had indeed made the right choice not knowing about the symbolic meaning of each one of these creatures. What really bothered me was that all I knew about butterflies was that they did not live long and then Dr. C. told me that they traveled far – what message was that supposed to be? I won’t live long? (and will travel far… to Heaven my mind wondered?). Maybe I should have chosen the hummingbird after all… Then I thought about Dr. C. for a while. I know that he would have never tried to trick me, his intention is always to get people to the highest level possible so he would have not let me choose a detrimental symbol, nor would he have suggested one in the first place. Although he often looks like he is flying by the seat of his pants, I know that the words he uses are always carefully chosen to produce and elicit positive transformations within people. So I had to look this up to better understand what he must have been intending for me. So I consulted my dear friend Dr. Google.
The first thing that jumped to my attention, was the commonalities between the symbolism of butterflies and hummingbirds, so Dr. C. was on to something… of course he was! Both butterflies and hummingbirds represent lightness of being, playfulness, and being able to travel great distances tirelessly (so strength and resilience). So maybe after all, either of these symbols were “right”. Although I “randomly” chose the butterfly, I still believe that my mind chose it over the hummingbird for a reason greater than I can explain. As I continued my search on the symbolic meaning of butterflies, I found out that butterflies are primarily associated with powerful transformation, life metamorphosis, the idea of moving through different life cycles, and finding joy in life and lightness of being. They represent the ability to move from one state, perspective, lifestyle to another. Well, that couldn’t be more appropriate for me. Having this cancer has certainly called for being able to adapt to a new lifestyle and it has greatly changed my perspective on life. Butterflies often have bright colors and by extension, they are associated with aliveness and brightness. This can represent the need to lighten up and add more color to your life. This can be challenging at times for me, but I know it will only benefit me to be more light and not let the heaviness of cancer rule my life.
I was almost relieved to read that although butterflies have short life span, they tend to represent immortality in many traditions around the world and by the way, the Monarchs are one of the longest living butterflies! (phew!).
If I had been asked to chose a symbol, I probably would not have chosen the butterfly. However, the more I think about it, the more appropriate I think it is to my situation. Of course this cancer is creating an inner metamorphosis and I will do my best to emerge as a better and even stronger person. Apparently, butterflies are the only living beings that can change their entire genetic structure (the DNA of the caterpillar is totally different from the DNA of the butterfly). So through this change, I will hopefully be able to get rid of the faulty cells in my system and reboot my genetic structure. Fred don’t get too excited, I looked it up and this does not work for the “cleaning gene” so don’t count on having this transformation making me clean more hahaha… I trust that this process is making me grow into something better and greater. The time in the cocoon is not always fun and comfortable, I guess these are the growing pains. I am ready for my miraculous transformation, I am ready to spread my new wings and fly high and far, watch me go!